john reads things.


"what in the world did i just read...?"

hi there! welcome to my blog. i am not too sure how you managed to find your way here, but do enjoy your stay?

the name is john, and i am 12 years old. i was recently convinced by a friend of mine to read one of those horrible fanfiction stories or whatever outloud... and so i did. i did get quite a bit of positive feedback (despite the story being completely HORRIBLE!!!), and somebody suggested i open a blog to let people submit things for me to read? i mean i'm not that great or anything, but if you get a kick out of me reading things, i suppose this could be fun.

let's do this!

pixels by feastings
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http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7324877/8/Homestuck_high

homestuck high.

chapter 8: solluxs lair.


plot twist: it updated. it… updated. augh! i have no idea how i managed to read through this. the previous chapter was bad in terms of content, but this was simply horrible to try and read through. randomnezz4eva123, summer has not done your spelling any good. it is time to go back now. 

i can’t quite figure out what this story was supposed to be about in the first place. i guess the summary did sum it up pretty well.

Join the cast of homestuck as they go through high school! They face dark magic, pregnancies, drama and more!”

there is not much more to say on the matter.

my english hurts.

So I thought you might like to know Homestuck High kinda updated. I suddenly got an alert from it and...if you thought the last chapter was bad, things just got worse.
oujoharippa-deactivated20130416

oh my god

well, that is definitely something to come back to. 

posted: 9 months ago
200,260 plays

atrueenglishman:

dodostad:

cyclicredundancy521:

My entry for the Homestuck OST competition, titled Alphamatic Replacement

okay this might be my favorite so far!! sounds great

This is. So good.

posted: 10 months ago
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http://archiveofourown.org/works/268019/chapters/421893

kawaii yaoi.

chapter 3

** WARNING: GORE **


the tags for this fic are becoming more and more pertinent now. i’m a little scared, yet intrigued. i don’t understand where the kawaii or yaoi is going to fit in all of this and seeing as how this is unfolding, i am not sure i want to know…

chapter 3: http://vocaroo.com/i/s0Dli2Tyxat7

your voice sounds really nice and as im writing this i realize how creepy it sounds oh well
Anonymous

oh uh… that is a little creepy, but thanks.

posted: 10 months ago
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http://archiveofourown.org/works/268019/chapters/421544

kawaii yaoi.

chapter 2


these chapters are long, i may actually have to cut them in half myself. this story is a bit of a mind trip… i stop understand what i’m reading in the middle of a paragraph when it starts spiraling downwards. it’s seriously making me feel like i am losing my mind.

i also came to the conclusion today that I CANNOT LISP!!!! i kind of wish this author would not have replaced all of the s’s with th’s. i can’t tell what certain words are unless i stare intently at them for a few moments and that is just inconvenient.

um… this isn’t so bad so far, but i am not really looking forward to the rest of this.

edit: i forgot to link the actual chapter.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0Q5G5qpRuCz

what if i just WROTE a fanfic. what if. what. if.
prettyyellowflowers

do you not do that already?

posted: 10 months ago
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http://archiveofourown.org/works/268019/chapters/421530?view_adult=true

kawaii yaoi.

chapter 1


what did i just get myself into? i didn’t realize this fic had 12 chapters until halfway through recording this.  i also did not take note of all the tags until just now. i blame the fact that it’s 6 in the morning. i am definitely going to regret this. 

the next time i think it’s a good idea to read something without properly looking through tags at the very least, somebody needs to punch me.

suggestion by anonymous, you sneaky bastard.

archiveofourown[.]org/works/268019/chapters/421530
Anonymous

oh, well this makes a lot more sense now.

posted: 10 months ago
*screeches* whY ARE YOU SO ADORABLEEE
Anonymous

it’s in the genes, i cant explain it. it just so happens that i am predisposed to this condition where everything i do is just SO ADORABLEEE.

also, please don’t lose your typing voice. 

posted: 10 months ago

all-of-you-are-walruses started following you

i read your username as “all-of-your-weenies”.

why am i even awake at this time? 

posted: 10 months ago
I haven't seen you on skype since the livestream, what's up dude?
summerclimax

i am a skype ninja. it is me. i need to tell you about my date, too! i’ll try to catch you online in the nearby future.

posted: 10 months ago
you cutieeeeeeeee *screeches* *rolls off of chair* *explodes*
Anonymous

and that’s the way the cookie crumbled.

posted: 10 months ago
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http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7976223/1/Riding_Lessons

riding lessons.

**WARNING: BESTIALITY???**

i don’t really know if this can be considered bestiality or not? i have read quite a few BAD fanfictions so far, but this is easily the strangest one. what the hell? i don’t know if i am scared or amused, or what exactly i SHOULD feel. this author seems to enjoy the use of japanese words in their stories. i honestly do not see the appeal, but i understand that they are probably doing it for comic relief as it was stated that their stories should not be taken seriously. 

on another note, i have no idea how to properly pronounce “whinny”. my knowledge about horse terms is limited to “saddle” and “really uncomfortable”. so uh… sorry about that.

fic also recommended by doublepistolsandawhat.tumblr.com.

omigod why are you such a cutie patoot?
senpai-will-never-notice-you-but

posted: 10 months ago